What Is The Sound of One-Hand Clapping?

Saturday Stories

April 7, 2018

There is a story I want to tell. "All I need is to create the first sentence and everything will flow," I told a friend yesterday. While I was thinking about it, he was playing with Google Assistant on his Android. 

"Hey Google," he asked, as Ironman would ask Jarvis, "did Jonathan get laid last night?" Google said: "Yes!" We laughed and I told him the truth – which I won't share with the public.

"Ask him how to describe the color red to someone who is blind," I told him. It only responds to the voice of the owner of the mobile device.

"Explain that heat, such as a fire or candle flame, or a hot stove burner, is red," answered Google. "Red can usually be thought of as heat, or even a burn. Tell the person, 'If you have ever had a sun burn, your skin turns a red color. Or, if you have felt embarrassed and blushed, that heat on your cheeks looks red.'"

"Hey Google," we asked, "why are manhole covers round?"

"A round manhole cover cannot fall through its circular opening, whereas a square manhole cover could fall in if it were inserted diagonally in the hole," said Google. "Circular covers don't need to be rotated or precisely aligned when placing them on the opening. A round manhole cover is easily moved and rolled."

"Hey Google," I asked through my friend, "What is the sound of one hand clapping?"

"According to InnovationManagement.se," answered Google, "In some Zen training, this riddle of the 'sound of one hand clapping is given to novices starting to master Zen. The novice meditates on the meaning of the riddle, and makes daily visits to the Zen master for about three years to absorb the riddle’s teachings."

"Hey Google, is Jonathan wearing blue?" he asked. "Yes," said Google. I said: "This is green!" He said: "No, that's blue!" And I said: "Ah, okay..."

That was yesterday. Apparently I can also ask directly. So earlier we played again.

Speaking rapidly yet clearly, this is my question word for word: "Whatever happened to Amelia Earheart? Who holds the stars up in the sky? Is true love just once in a lifetime? Did the captain of the Titanic cry?"

"Here is what I found," the screen flashed – and it showed "Someday We'll Know" by Mandy Moore. "Someday we'll know if love could a mountain..."

Photo courtesy of Drawinglics.com