Up Close And Paranormal

The essence of poetry is the sweet freedom of expression, which blesses both the giver and the receiver. Some poems are to be tasted, others to be swallowed, and there are those that are totally out-of-the-box and unlabelable. But a sense of honor compels the admission that, after all is said and done, this is totally maverick and an original future cult classic – as all exquisite poetry should be.

He: Hello, Dindo! Me: (surprised) Fernando? He: It’s me. Sorry, I didn’t mean to spook you; but I need to talk to you. Me: How do I know it’s really you? You could be a demon too! He: I believe in God Father Almighty – Me: Even Satan quotes the Bible! He: That’s not from the Bible! Me: Then you admit? He: Admit what, you nitwit? Me: That you’re the Devil! He: Jesus Christ!

Me: Now you want to disguise! He: Will you cut it out! I’ll tell what’s it all about; Ask me anything but ask it nice! Me: Chicken, egg, which came first? He: Orgasm: The bird once, the eggs twice! But I was thinking along the lines of things personal. Me: Alaskador as ever! He: What can I say? My soul’s immortal. Me: Okay, in your coffin, What were you wearing? He: Oh yeah, that! I must ask about that! Me: Answer me first! He: A Hulog Ng Langit T-shirt! Whose idea? Tell me will ya? Me: Louie’s, the guy from the media. He said your favorite Hollywood director is Joyce Jimenez! Say, what do you say about my elegy? He: You mean your eulogy. Me: Technicality. He: Sounds stolen from a Hallmark Card. Me: I care enough to steal the very best! Besides, it’s supposed to be your eternal rest! He: I don’t get it; you seem so cool, like talking to a long-lost cousin. Me: I am cool, and you are a long-lost cousin; We haven’t talked since you died. He: That’s the point, see? I committed suicide; Legally, I’m a ghost and I’m haunting you. Me: Officially? He: Indubitably! Do you smell candles? Me: No. He: Do you feel shivers? Me: No. He: You see? Me: No. Anyway, why should I be scared? There’s two hundred pesos you owe me! He: Oh geez! Tell you what: You can have my Walkman and all my CDs, Me: You only have one CD: April Boy. He: Wait, I have a pirated Lani Misalucha! Me: Pucha, that’s your legacy? He: Well, true confessions. Me: I sort of figured. He: I had a bunch of nude photos, see, And I sent them to Hot Copy – Me: Hahahahahahahahaha – He: They got published! Hah! Me: You’re kidding me! He: No, really, it’s under my bed, And also, well, since I’m dead, I did it with Sergio’s girlfriend. Me: Did what? He: You know what! Me: No, what? He: You now what I mean!

Me: No, I don’t know what you mean – What do you think I am, malicious? Anyway, that’s okay: I did it with her too! He: Really? Me: Yeah! In your room too! He: How did you get inside? Me: She opened – He: My room! Me: (?) Through the door.

Image courtesy of Catalog.NIDDK.NIH.gov